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Pierre Poilievre Vows to Win Women Back by Explaining Why They’re Wrong

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A new Angus Reid poll has found that nearly two-thirds of Canadian women have an unfavourable opinion of Pierre Poilievre, confirming that the Conservative leader has finally united Canadians around one shared experience: immediately getting the ick.

The survey found just 28 per cent of women view Poilievre positively, while Prime Minister Mark Carney enjoys a 56 per cent approval rating among women. Analysts say it’s difficult to compete with a man whose greatest political liability is looking like he knows what an interest rate is.

Poilievre’s previous comments about women’s biological clocks also resurfaced, reminding voters that nothing says “future prime minister” quite like explaining female fertility to women.

Conservative strategists insist the numbers are misleading, arguing the poll failed to include the key demographic of guys replying “Actually…” under every woman’s social media post.

At press time, Poilievre was announcing a bold new plan to improve his numbers by explaining the poll to women.

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