Separatists Spend Decades Screaming ‘Hands Off Alberta’ Before Reportedly Asking Washington Which Parts It Wants
After years warning that Ottawa intends to steal Alberta’s oil, water and sovereignty, Alberta separatists have reportedly discovered a foolproof way to protect all three: offer them to the United States themselves.
The Globe and Mail reports separatist figures discussed giving Americans access to fresh water and oil royalties while seeking U.S. help achieving independence, although another separatist leader disputes those resources were offered.
The movement also reportedly met Republican operatives from Michigan in Calgary, demonstrating its fierce commitment to keeping Alberta’s future free from meddling by outsiders from thousands of kilometres away, unless those outsiders brought American flags.
Separatists insist their movement remains about preventing distant elites from exploiting Alberta’s resources.
Fortunately, Washington is slightly closer than Ottawa if you measure distance exclusively in political fantasies.
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