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Party like it’s 1187. Pam Bondi announces beginning of New Crusade | Breakfast Scotch NationalSkip to content
On Tuesday, Trump Attorney General Pam Bondi, wearing the traditional holy armor, was joined by other Cabinet officials, announcing that she had convened the first meeting of a task force that President Donald Trump has charged with “searching for and eradicating” what he’s described as “anti-Christian bias” within federal agencies and regulatory practices.
“Every war results from the struggle for markets and spheres of influence,” Bondi declared, pausing briefly to instruct the task force to start gathering the pitchforks and torches, before continuing, “ as a Holy Crusade to save God and Goodness from Satan and Evil.”
When asked by reporters if she was going too far and had any evidence to backup her actions, Bondi went on to attack the previous administration of former president Joe Biden,“Sleepy Joe had abused and targeted Christians, and under Emperor Trump the heathens shal be rounded up and shown the true fear of god!”