In an abrupt but somehow unsurprising move, the White House has dismissed the entire architectural commission assigned to review former President Donald Trump’s self-described “majestic and totally affordable” $300 ballroom proposal.
The commission, composed of respected architects, historians, and one guy who once installed a chandelier, had reportedly spent months trying to determine whether the project was a joke. “We asked for blueprints and got a napkin drawing labeled ‘Make It Classy,’” one member said before being escorted out.
Sources claim the design featured “unprecedented opulence,” including gold-painted Styrofoam columns, a mirrored ceiling, and a dance floor “fit for kings or Mar-a-Lago donors.” Trump allegedly insisted the room could be built “under budget” and “with leftover parts from the old Taj Mahal casino.”
When asked for comment, the former president said the firing was “a huge win for architecture” and offered to redesign the Lincoln Bedroom next – “for $150, all-inclusive.”
