#MakeEarthMeltAgain Majority of Citizens Now Worried Climate Change Won’t Arrive Soon Enough
In a stunning twist on apocalyptic anxiety, a new worldwide poll reveals that 53% of respondents are now worried that climate change might not arrive soon enough—a sentiment driven largely by recent political developments, especially those involving former U.S. President Donald Trump.
The survey, conducted by the International Institute for Ironic Trends, asked 70,000 people across 46 countries how they felt about climate change in the wake of Trump’s latest escapades, which included attempting to annex Greenland again “for the vibes” and appointing a MyPillow executive to head NASA.
“Honestly, if the ocean could just hurry up and swallow Florida, I wouldn’t be mad,” said one respondent from Denmark. Another participant from Canada added, “We used to fear heatwaves and droughts. Now, we fear another Trump TikTok freestyle.”
The poll suggests a growing number of people see environmental catastrophe as a preferable alternative to geopolitical chaos. “Rising sea levels may destroy coastal cities,” said one UN analyst, “but at least they won’t tweet about it at 3 a.m.”
Critics warn that embracing ecological doom as an escape plan may not be the healthiest coping mechanism, but mental health professionals say it’s a step up from injecting bleach.
Meanwhile, Trump responded on Truth Social: “More people than ever are rooting for climate change. I did that. You’re welcome. #MakeEarthMeltAgain”
Scientists remain baffled. Not by climate change—it’s still real—but by humanity’s ability to make anything worse, even Armageddon.
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