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  • UN Endorses Trump Gaza Plan, Diplomats Pray It Comes With Instructions
  • Epstein Files to Be Released; Congress Achieves Bipartisanship Only When Terrified
  • Trump Pardons “Patriots of the Past,” Declares 2020 Election “Officially Un-Overturned”
  • Canadian Border Agents Heroically Stop Man Armed With Nothing but Expertise
  • Congress Unites to Demand Epstein Files, Alarming Everyone Who Assumed They’d Never Agree on Anything
  • GOP Caught Off Guard as Trump Suddenly Endorses Honesty, Chaos Ensues
  • Trump Scraps Food Tariffs, Says Prices Will Plummet; Economists Ask “Wait… How?”
  • Rocky Mountain High… in Dengue Risk: Tropical Mosquito Moves In
  • “Irreconcilable Conspiracy Differences” Trump Yanks Support From Marjorie Taylor Greene
  • Parents look for new Scapegoat as No Credible Link Found Between Tylenol and Autism

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