Alberta’s renewable energy boom has been abruptly unplugged, leaving solar farms, wind projects, and one unfortunate guy with a backyard turbine wondering what went wrong. The provincial government, citing “concerns over viewscapes” and “unspecified rural vibes,” has canceled or delayed billions in clean energy projects, prompting industry watchers to panic in the same way you might if your doctor casually suggested you stop breathing.
Critics warn the cancellations will cost jobs, investment, and Alberta’s faint hope of looking modern before the oil runs out. Supporters argue it’s about preserving the province’s heritage; namely, the scenic tradition of flaming tailing ponds and oil pumpjacks decorating every horizon.
“It’s like canceling parachutes halfway through a skydive,” said one analyst, adding that Alberta has now officially rebranded itself as “Texas without the sunshine.” Meanwhile, fossil fuel lobbyists were reportedly seen popping champagne, powered exclusively by diesel generators.
