In a rare moment of lucidity between elk meat recipes and DMT flashbacks, podcast emperor Joe Rogan torched the Trump administration over the latest Epstein revelations. “They think we’re babies,” Rogan ranted, visibly shaking his head while sipping bone broth. “Like, we can’t handle the truth that this pedo-ring had government VIP passes?”
The Trump camp, typically unbothered by facts or mortality, dismissed Rogan’s comments as “just another bald guy with questions.” But Rogan’s followers, equal parts libertarians, bodybuilders, and men who think showers lower testosterone, are listening.
“This smells like a cover-up marinated in CIA barbecue sauce,” Rogan added, before casually pivoting to an ad for gorilla protein powder.
Meanwhile, public trust in anything remotely institutional continued its nosedive, as the Epstein scandal morphs into America’s favorite true crime reality show—with fewer answers, more billionaires, and zero consequences.
