In a bold move that experts are already calling “optimistically chaotic,” the U.S. military has deployed a second cutting-edge fighter jet to search the Atlantic Ocean for the first one it lost just days ago. The initial aircraft, an F-35, went missing after a mishap that pilots insist “could’ve happened to anyone,” despite a price tag higher than the GDP of several small nations.
Pentagon spokesperson Lt. Col. Sarah Marks confirmed the decision at a press briefing. “We remain committed to locating our missing F-35. To that end, we have deployed a second jet with even more advanced systems to locate the first one,” Marks said, struggling to maintain eye contact.
Unfortunately, early reports suggest that the second jet “may have encountered similar navigational challenges” and is now also “somewhere in the ocean.” Marks assured reporters that the situation remains under control, adding, “We still have, like, dozens of these things, so no reason to panic.”
When asked if the military plans to send a third jet to locate the other two, Marks replied, “We’ll cross that bridge when we can afford to build it.”
