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  • Ohio Meth Raccoon Floated as Potential 2028 Democratic Candidate After Polls Show He’d Win Florida
  • “Oops, All Dictators”: Pete Hegseth Accidentally Adds Vladimir Putin to Signal Group Chat
  • U.S. Military Deploys Second Fighter Jet to Search for First, Promptly Loses That One Too
  • “Luxury Time-Out” Trump Rebrands Alcatraz for People Who Annoy Him
  • “Essential for Hiding Corpses of Truth and Credibility” Alberta Government Defends $280K Office Carpet
  • Top 10 Dystopian Reading List to prep you for the Trumpocalypse
  • “Vladimir Stop” Trouble in Paradise between Donald and Putin
  • “Nobody wants to play with you” Pierre Poilievre told to stay home
  • Carney Wins 100% of Key Demographic: Guys Selling Flags At Roadside Stand
  • Party like it’s 1187. Pam Bondi announces beginning of New Crusade

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