With six people now officially jostling to be Edmonton’s next mayor, local voters could be forgiven for mistaking the campaign trail for a six-way improv comedy show, except no one’s laughing, and the ticket price is taxes.
Fresh polling released this week shows the hopefuls locked in a statistical tie, otherwise known as “the electorate collectively shrugging.” Candidates have responded by frantically dialing up their campaign promises: one vows fiscal discipline, another pledges visionary leadership, and at least one is believed to be workshopping a catchy TikTok dance.
Political scientists note that Edmonton hasn’t had this many people desperate to run the city since the last pothole season. “It’s like Survivor,” said one analyst. “But with more backstabbing and worse lighting.”
Voters head to the polls wondering which candidate can best tackle crumbling infrastructure, rising costs, and the existential dread of realizing that, yes, someone actually has to win.
