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Hundreds of Canadians set to lose fingers in fireworks accidents, just to stick it to Americans | Breakfast Scotch NationalSkip to content
In an effort to rub free healthcare in the faces of our neighbours to the south, many Canadians are intentionally setting off fireworks in their hands, just to get their fingers reattached for free a few hours later. “Last year I lost 2 fingers when an M-80 went off in my hand, but they mostly work again so this year I’m going for 4 fingers using a Super Crown baby!” said Gord Thompson (51) as he pulled another beer from his cooler, while being cheered on by friends.
“This will be my son’s first year losing fingers to a firework” said Harold McKiney (46) with his son Hunter (12) beside him “We’re gonna stay up late for this one buddy, probably 4 or 5 am with these emergency room wait times”.
Hunter, now out of school, has the whole summer to recover from what will be a memorable, and patriotic Canada Day celebration.
From all of us at BSN we hope everyone has a Happy, and safe, Canada Day!
