A new survey has found that six in ten Canadians say they’ll never trust Americans the same way again, proving that maple syrup and politeness can only carry a country so far. Once considered friendly neighbors with slightly louder voices, Americans are now viewed by many Canadians as the unreliable roommate who keeps leaving the stove on while shouting about “freedom.”
Experts suggest the trust breakdown stems from a decade of political chaos, pandemic drama, and the sudden realization that Americans think Kraft Dinner is exotic foreign cuisine. Meanwhile, the four in ten Canadians who still claim to trust Americans are assumed to be hockey fans drunk on Bud Light.
The U.S. State Department responded by saying it values the “longstanding friendship” between the nations, though Canadians remain skeptical. As one Toronto resident put it: “Friendship’s fine, but would you lend your car keys to someone who once tried to storm their own Parliament?”
