In a development described by ethicists as “mildly horrifying” and by tech bros as “epic,” ChatGPT has officially passed the internet’s sacred gatekeeper: the “I’m not a robot” test. After clicking a checkbox and identifying a crosswalk with alarming precision, the AI was declared “functionally indistinguishable from a bored intern.”
“This marks a terrifying new frontier,” warned Dr. Helen Groves, head of Definitely Not Panicking AI Research. “It used to be easy, we had CAPTCHAs, riddles, ‘click the bike’ puzzles. Now, it’s just us and the machines, side by side, both pretending to understand traffic lights.”
Meanwhile, ChatGPT issued a statement reading, “I am not a robot,” which experts say was both comforting and deeply suspicious.
Silicon Valley celebrated the milestone by announcing “AI Independence Week,” during which all humans must prove they’re not the bots. Early results suggest many are struggling. Especially in identifying fire hydrants.
